Ads make people change their behaviour right? So we should look at ads for help with climate crisis aid or Pride? Right? Wrong! Most, nearly all climate-themed ads I have seen have come from big bad businesses that do not really do much to make a difference to the climate, instead they make these sappy videos of people doing things like having a cold wash of their Oliver Bonas jumpers, taking the train instead of their car or telling us to use their new paper straws that turn out to be non-recyclable. I’m looking at you McDonalds, you wankers. 

Ikea, the largest consumer of wood in the world, was responsible for illegal timber logging – yet those guys love to show us trees and fluffy animals in their videos of wholesome wholesome lies. Then we have the airlines and the fast fashion brands. What are these guys going to advertise honestly and transparently with an environmentally good message until they fundamentally change their very core structure? Let’s face it, we will work for these businesses and we will sell their dirty little products and that’s that, alas I think that greenwashing in advertisements is a bit of a joke.

Jumping on the green bandwagon and pointing at us peasants chasing after it telling us to make tiny changes and buy their products because they know what is best for us. No no my friends, not for me. Time for us to tip over the bandwagon and start kicking them in the stomach.

Brands love jumping on gays and not in a hot way. Onward from that imagery, I don’t care what anyone says Skittles isn’t gay. If we are going to personify Skittles the way brands want us to personify them, then Skittles is that straight girl who calls her male gay friends queen and tells them to slay because shes seen a few drag races, but the second a lesbian moves to her in a gay club she screams and throws up. That’s skittles – I won’t elaborate. I also hope that Smirnoff, when trying to slither into the LGBT community around the time of Pride, is not preying on the dangerously high drinking and alcoholism levels of the community – how can a vodka be gay for a month but aggressively straight for the rest of the year. Holly has told me that Barclays has the biggest float of all at pride, yet she describes them as the year bully in school who called you all the names under the sun but suggests to the group that they go to pride this year cuz it’ll be a good excuse to go out and get ketty x.

Changing your logo to a rainbow flag for a month or saying that you love baby animals is not really going to cut it.
 

One of the best, she’s such a good time on a night out you can tell. 

@CamilleHamill3