By Phillip Laskaris

3 Easy Steps to Solve Everything

This week I was told by one person that I’m ‘the best’ at keeping things serious at SCA and understanding the weight of a situation without letting it destroy me mentally. 

They didn’t say I’m the best at writing or have hilarious ideas or even that I’m a nice guy. All they said was that it looks like I’m not falling apart, and I couldn’t have been more flattered. 

So, I’m sure you’re wondering – Phillip! How ever do you do it? 

Well here you go. Coming from the absolute best person who knows everything and has the best life and is definitely not freaking out and has never felt an ounce of stress ever; here are my rules that will definitely solve every issue in your life, guaranteed or your money back. * 

1. See your friends and/or family.  

I live with 7 other people. It sounds like a nightmare but it’s incredible. Why? Because they fucking hate advertising and it’s really important to live with people who fucking hate advertising. Without them it would envelop my life. I would live and breathe SCA until it’s darkness slowly turned my heart black. Every single time I start talking about ads I’m greeted with a chorus of moans. As I should be. No one cares about ads and you need to be reminded of this every day. This will keep your priorities straight.

1. Cook (or clean) as much as you can. It’s essentially mediation, but edible.

It can feel impossible to relax at SCA. And using traditional methods of meditation to get my mind off work is pointless. Sitting in silence trying to not think about work is only going to make it worse. Cooking, however, is fantastic. Cooking requires focus on multiple things, but not on something too complicated. I cook and I let go of everything else because there’s no space for anything else. You can’t have guilt for not doing work because you need to eat, so you’re being productive. Scrolling through a timeline? Not really productive and I feel guilty doing it. Giving my body the nutrition it needs to survive? Nothing wrong with that. And on top of that, once you’re done you get to eat the fruit of your labour. The last time I ate one of my ads, it sucked. Same goes for cleaning, but be careful, you can clean too much to where it becomes a method of procrastination. 

1.  Commuting can be great. 

Commuting is me time. I look forward to it. In the mornings I see Snake Bite – the girl who is either wearing a green jacket with a snakeskin pattern or boots with a snakeskin pattern – I get on the bus and read the New York Times briefing. That takes me to the train. On the train I get into my favourite standing spot – those leaning areas at the end of each car – and I observe. I’ll eavesdrop on a conversation. Read someone’s paper. Watch their tv show. Listen to their music. A real invasion of privacy maybe, but what they don’t know won’t hurt them. In the afternoon, once I’m on the train I listen to my basketball podcast and get lost in the latest feats of NBA brilliance. The whole goal of the commute is to get to and from work, so the actual action of it is for me, not for work. 

These methods work for me and they’re not foolproof. For other people, different methods may be of more use. No one can give your life advice except for yourself. Only you know what you need. 

*I’m not responsible if your life is still shit after reading this.