Believe in your f*cking self – By @monaonthemoon
By Mona Sharif
Believe in your f*cking self
Week 9. Feeling safer and safer in the big fat penguin family. But one question keeps running in my head. ‘Who am I?’ During these past weeks at SCA, I was surprised to see that what I’m finding the most complicated is not speaking in a language than is not my native language or replacing procrastination by organisation. Deanna Rodger and Adah Parris, two very inspiring mentors, gave us masterclasses about ourselves. Who am I? How to define myself in a few words or in a sentence? How to create my personal brand story? We had different workshops helping us discover who we truly are and I found it simply terrifying. I looked at my paper and just couldn’t write a single word. I never really asked myself who I am. I love giving advices, telling what I like about someone, seeing the beautiful side of people, but when it comes to myself, I usually skip my turn. Probably the reason why my job interviews were all really good until the part where I have to describe myself. I have never been a very confident person, and some things that happen ed in the past didn’t help me with this and made me lose a lot of my self confidence. But one of the things I remember from Adah is that we all have stories, we all have things that we would rather just forget and imagine that they never happened, but it’s not the right thing to do. Every story is part of us and we learn from every experience.
The other thing that I find really hard is to trust people. It usually takes me a really long time to trust people, even my friends. Part of the SCA journey is about finding a partner. Someone you will work with everyday single day. Someone that loves the same kind of work as you. Someone with who you can laugh, cry, think. Someone you respect. Someone that has the same motivation and energy as you. Someone you TRUST. I always found it hard to trust people and now I’m starting to ask myself questions I never really thought about before… How can you trust someone when you don’t trust yourself? How can someone trust you if you don’t trust him? How can someone trust you if you can’t even trust yourself?
As the saying goes ‘The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself’. In fact, by listening to Adah and Deanna I know now that when I will be more confident about myself, I will be able to trust people and find the right partner, and I am starting right now. Have a good night,