Clippy – By @joeyfraser95
By Joe Fraser
This is a conversation that actually happened. Mostly.
*Out walking my dog*
Joe: Oh. Hi, Anna.
Joe: Aw, sweet dog. Haven’t seen him before! Where’s Clippy?
Anna: Clippy die.
Joe: Oh. Oh I’m so sorry.
Anna: Clippy old. Now this new Clippy.
Joe: You – you called your new dog Clippy as well?
Anna: We no get confused.
Joe: Because –
Joe: Because the other Clippy –
Joe: Because the other Clippy’s dead –
Joe: Because the other Clippy’s dead so why would you get confused right.
Anna: How is Poppy?
Joe: She seems all right. She likes new Clippy it looks like.
Anna: What wrong with Poppy’s eye?
Joe: Yeah she had a little infection but it’s –
Anna: Dangerous to get infection. In the eye! The eye! At her age.
Joe: I mean, we have it under control so should be okay.
Anna: Could kill Poppy.
Joe: I don’t know if that’s true.
Anna: It’s how Clippy die.
Joe: Clippy died from an eye infection?
Anna: And cancer.
Joe: That sounds like the bigger reason for his death.
Anna: Yes. But the eye did hurt him.
Joe: I mean, for sure. But… but the cancer…
Anna: The cancer killed him. Yes
Joe: So, when you said Poppy’s eye…
Anna: How school?
Joe: Oh, how did you –
Anna: I walk with your mother nearly every day. We walk all the lake and talk about every thing.
Joe: Ah, okay. Well, school’s good. Still got a lot to learn but, you know, getting there.
Joe: Yeah, it’s an advertising school.
Anna: I like adverts.
Joe: Really? Most people hate them.
Anna: Good ones are good.
Joe: That’s true.
Anna: People like adverts. People don’t like bad adverts. They don’t know it. But it’s true.
Joe: Do you think so?
Joe: Well, hopefully I’ll be making the good ones.
Anna: I don’t think.
Joe: You – you don’t think I’ll make good ads?
Anna: Good adverts don’t here anymore.
Joe: I dunno. There’s definitely a lot of crap but, like you said, when you see a good one you know it’s a good one. People are just so used to seeing shit ones they think all adverts are shit.
Anna: Should not swear.
Anna: So you no job?
Joe: I can tell you’ve been walking with my mum. No. Not yet.
Joe: Yeah. A placement is more likely but a proper job would be – just – bloody great. Fingers crossed. Touch wood.
Anna: I don’t think –
Joe: Yeah I don’t think touch wood works like that either.
Anna: Is school hard?
Joe: Yeah. And no. The work is hard but, doable? I guess. It’s more working hard than the work itself is hard. You know?
Joe: Well, I don’t know how else to say it.
Joe: Do you miss Clippy?
Anna: Clippy over there.
Joe: No – I mean – old Clippy.
Anna: Old Clippy very old. It sad but now we happy with new Clippy. Move on.
Anna: Okay. Clippy and me go this way. Goodbye, Joe! Say hello to you mother.
Joe: Yep, will do. Bye then.
Joe: Move on. Hm. That could be an Adidas line. Or maybe Slazenger if I’m working on a challenger brand…