By Charles Hue Williams

 

Put Yourself Out There

 

We are starting to branch out from the predetermined partnerships the school had allocated us, from before the start of term. This development however comes with a whole new set of challenges…

 

• Who do I work with? 
• How do I get their attention?
• When can they fit me in?

 

The process of partnering up at SCA raises questions that are all too similar to the pursuit of a relationship in the real world. In a recent strategy class on insights by Shekar Deshpande, we were posed the question; why do people feel vulnerable when confronted with the concept of a romantic relationship? The response was that by removing your involvement from the decision making process, you essentially lose control of the desired outcome. 

 

People therefore become dependant on their partner. Constantly craving reassurance in the relationship to make sure they’re on the correct path. This can lead to the onset of insecurity and self doubt, as the questions posed frequently receive no answer. Especially when most are internalised and never actually meet the partners ear.

 

Partnering up at SCA is no different. Plagued with the questions of self worth and mutual admiration.

 

Decisions of whether you can deliver? 

What your potential partner expects of you? 

And better yet, can you go beyond?

 

Then on the other side, trying to identify why or why not they’re drawn to you? 

What value do you actually represent?

And how do you get people to recognise what you bring to the table?

 

These are all intimidating questions with unexplored answers. In the same way, however, we identified how similar these issues are to romantic relationships, maybe in their lies the answer of where to start?

 

How do you maintain a prosperous romantic relationship?

 

• Build trust and stability over time
• Rely on an aspect of chance 
• Share thoughts and questions 
• Be natural and yourself 
• Be honest
• Appreciate your own personal time and theirs 
• Learn to understand them 
• Be surprising 
• Master the ability to compromise
• Share in similar pleasures 
• Enjoy your commonalities 

 

These examples demonstrate that the best way to approach the situation of developing a healthy relationship is actually to be yourself. You can’t be anything your not and if your partner wants or expects you to be something else – beyond the truth – then surely they’re not the right match for you. 

 

Although we live in a world where it’s just as common to separate as it is to be together there’s still plenty of reminders that a good relationship is achievable. 

 

From a creative perspective (and probably a romantic) the best option is to be confident and true to yourself. There are obviously boundaries to this concept and you can’t disregard the other person completely. Equally there is no point in providing a space for self doubt, producing answers before you’ve even asked the questions. 

 

The best option is to stand up tall and push through. Conquer challenges when you’re presented with them and not before. Believe in yourself until you fail and then trust that you will learn and come back even stronger. 

 

It all starts with putting yourself out there.