Shoulda, Coulda, Can – By @rubyquince
By Ruby Quince
Shoulda, Coulda, Can
There’s a whole lot of coulda/ shoulda going about the SCA studio as we twirl into our last week. We heard the advice, the leg-bowing weight of bare minimums needed to complete at the top level. We’ve taken on board the mythical stories of successful past students and their samurai-style discipline. Sure, they aren’t always strictly facts, but I respect that that shouldn’t ruin a good story.
There’s a foreboding sense of ‘did I make the most of that?’. Did I let myself to crazy? Did I embrace every facet, did I open every door and wonder around? Honestly, no, I know I could have committed more, and let go more.
Attention has swung sternly to the outside world. People are clawing at agencies, looking for that golden ticket to a stint of paid bliss and the chance to convert it to a bona fide jay oh be. Is easy to assign school to the past, as a stepping stone to the new. I’m trying not to see it that way.
Finishing the course shouldn’t mean that we can’t keep on trying to learn and develop and do the things we feel we didn’t master. I can be a slow learner (pig-headed, some would say) and quite a lot of the things we’ve heard are just coming home to roost. I have a feeling there are more pigeons coming my way.
This is how this SCAB started:
Title: Just put it in comic sans, print it and send it to your dog.
I still find writing SCABs a bi-weekly chore. I always think ‘give us a bloody theme or task’. Of course, a coulda done that myself. I shoulda done that myself. I CAN do that myself.
And suddenly a chore has become something useful. ‘I’ll knock something out’ has turned into something that’s brought me some comfort. Cynicism is quite unhelpful. Perhaps that’s a big part of my SCA.
Before I go, some gratitude and thanks.
- I’ve met some really inspiring, genuine, intriguing, curious, fizzy creative people of all shapes, and I’m grateful for them for their company and inspiration. I’ve been utterly humbled by people decades my junior.
- The mentors deserve serious praise for giving up their time and putting up with us. Their ability to latch onto what we’re trying to express and build on it is quite a feat. And the lines/ ideas/ design that we steal at will is a gift.
- Sure, Marc’s a funny old goose, but he’s found his calling and it’s a noble one. He believes in and cares about us and it’s precious. I wonder if he’ll ever get that OBE.
- The team in the office who really make things tick. It’s the small stuff and it’s the big stuff. It’s really important and I’m sure it’s every bit as much a part of SCA as the big knobs. It doesn’t go unnoticed and I really hope that it’s not a thankless task. Thank you.