Answers to Zoe’s questions. By @Jonothankh

By Jonothan Hunt



Answers to Zoe’s questions.


– Why are the Paralympics so separate from the Olympics? Within that, why do they have two different names? I hope and predict that one day we should all be competing together in the same games.


  • –  Why do we wear underwear?

Mostly because of leakage. And also having the ol’ John Thomas lashing about.


  • –  Who decided that flowers should be cut up and be put inside?

When humankind found the need to see beauty and bring the balance we find outside, in, flowers were an easy mechanism.


  • –  Why do we put plates on walls?

These are the same people who think the queen makes sense.


  • –  Why do we have to be nice?

Because we wouldn’t be productive otherwise.


  • –  Why do some people succeed and others don’t?

Some people don’t want to succeed. Or they do it wrong. Or arguably the people that do succeed haven’t really and visa versa.


  • –  Why do we ‘laugh’ when we find things funny?

I believe laughter came from the panting tendencies of our ancestors.


  • –  Why do we have to hold our fork in the right hand?

I don’t.


  • –  Why can’t we eat with our hands?

We can. But eating utensils save us from getting dirty and slowing us down.


  • –  Why do we have random rooms filled with machinery that you have to pay to walk into and use called gyms?

Because of the ease of showers, multiple disciplinary work outs in one place for starters. Again, I don’t go to one. And I’m told Zoë (who’s questions these are), has just cancelled her membership).


  • –  Why does society STILL imply that having any kind of degree deems you clever, and above other people

I can tell you don’t have a degree.


  • –  How do awful singers survive in the music industry?

Simon Cowell.


  • –  How were girls aloud actually created?

ITV’s Pop Stars

  • –  Why do we have to eat certain things for breakfast?

Energy boost to start the day.


  • –  Why do we category food into placing it on bowls or plates?

So we can choose what we want and in what order.


  • –  Why do girls pierce their ears, and it’s seen abnormal if you don’t?

I didn’t know this.


  • –  Why is sex seemed awkward to talk about?

I’ve noticed this too. Maybe because it’s personal, and… er… yeah I don’t know.


  • –  Why can’t kids know about sex?

Because it ruins the story of Jesus.


  • –  Why can’t we teach children about violence?

We do. Video games.


  • –  Why can’t we be taught logical things in school like mortgages?

School is not very functional for anything other than immediately furthering our economy.


  • –  Why aren’t we being taught how to freelance and write invoices even though we’re being told the industry is moving forward?

Education is back at least 10 years.

  • –  Why is everyone going vegan?

Because social media exposes them to videos of dead animals.


  • –  Why are we being told google will take over the world, yet everyone’s cool with it?

Google Docs is pretty good.


  • –  Why did those people give up their lives to live on Mars (this is happening)?

Who wants to have kids here?


  • –  Why do people want to go to space?

Because they’ve ruined earth a bit.


  • –  Are people actually gluten-free?

Yes. My mother needs special medication if she eats any. Other, though, just want to be seen in the free-from isle.


  • –  Why don’t people who work at Coke want to drink Coke?

Have you seen what happens if you boil it?


  • –  Could tea and coffee one day be illegal?



  • –  How were sausage dogs bread?

Some Labrador got excited with some Golden Wonder Classics. Went from there.


  • –  Why do we become friends with people who look like us?

I don’t think I look like you.


  • –  Do we actually look for spouses who look like our parents?

Apparently so. We’re emotional scarred.


  • –  How long have I actually spent on my laptop?

I don’t know.


  • –  Why is peanut butter so calorific?



  • –  Why does sugar tastes so good?

Our brain responds to its energy giving properties.


  • –  Why do we go red when we get embarrassed

Blood flow increases(?)


  • –  Why do I stress?

You don’t do meditation. Or you’re human.


  • –  Why am I writing this?

You tell me.

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