SCABs

First Ever SCAB from @RomanLapacz – It’s on Dirty Dancing :-)

Roman Lapacz

By Roman Lapacz

 

Problem : I think I don’t understand women.
Insight : Dirty Dancing is a movie that all women seems to love, for some reason.
Solution : Watch it and try to understand why they love it.

Well, I did it.
I stayed 1 hour and 40 minutes in front of that film refusing the urge of shutting it down.
From the very beginning until the last second, I was hoping for some kind of epiphany, something huge, just like the day I understood how to open a bra.
But all I learned is, if you can synchronize the movement of your ass with any kind of Spanish music, even wearing a mullet can’t get in your way.
That’s a good news regarding my hairstyle, now all I have to do is spend the next 5 years learning flamenco. Simple. And if I add a leather jacket and a six pack, I can even turn my brain off.
I guess I will start with the jacket.

But even thought I’m beginning to get what women wants, now I have a problem with the male character.
This guy could get any girl in the hotel, including his incredibly sexy childhood friend, who happens to have the same passion for dance than him, and he still ends up with the most boring girl in the history of cinema. Yes, let’s talk about that Baby for a minute. I would buy it if her average look went with an inspiring personality, a really sharp mind or a an amazing sense of humor. But no, she is foolish, completely uninteresting, and she spend the whole movie either crying or yelling at peoples. All she has is a rich dad. And you will notice that Johnny  spent more time trying to seduce him than his daughter. Nice move bro, but the sister is hotter.
By the way, she is the perfect exemple of how women work today. She dreams about a night under a sky full of stars with a mysterious stranger who will free her from the monotony of life and fulfill all her fantasy…
And she gets banged in the woods by a waiter.
The same guy who is hitting on a different girl in every scene, get two pregnant, one half dead, and who’s only punition is a glass of water on his trouser.
That’s not fair at all, I mean, maybe I only last 3 minutes (on the dancefloor), but at least I’v got the decency of buying condoms. I just have to hope that they won’t be expired in 5 years.

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