Jayne talks planes. – By @ZSlatter

By Zoë Slatter


Jayne talks planes.


Jayne’s been quiet for a little bit, as she aware people are beginning to think her commercial aviation addiction is getting a little out of hand. She was caught flight thrill riding at Heathrow terminal 5, hanging onto boarding run ray railings in the hope of flying from the air exhaust of a fly bee 5442 propeller plane. She was waiting for an Emeritus plane to take off with a quadruple engine when someone noticed her and got her removed. If you know anything about Jayne Mundane you know she’s an avid plane addict. She dreams planes, speaks planes and practically eats planes. She loves those birds in the sky and refers to them as flying elephants that defy the laws of physics.


No one quite understands Jaynes addiction. It all started when she began watching the national geographic air crash investigation series in 2007. The thrill and addiction got her there. But this moved on to something else, she lingered around airports, waited to spot pilots and even tried spotting air hostesses in the street on their way to work as this is way more entertaining spotting them on the ground than it is in the air. Jayne’s addiction has gone so far into the fact that she now works as a cleaner at Luton Airport cleaning the big window and increasingly stays late and gets in early in stare at the planes in the wonder of their beauty. Jayne’s main aim is to work on the ground directing planes to their ‘nighttime sleeping’ as she calls it, but after many interviews, she still needs a lot of training and to prove her reliability for this.


However, Jayne’s addiction has played off as her intensive night time research has found that Emirates are looking into windowless planes. This is because it makes them lighter and faster. Jayne became horrified about the thought that planes could one day be windowless. Emirates has always been one of Jayne’s favourite airlines as their the easiest to spot when on the ground because of their strong graphic branding; this makes it even harder for Jayne to correlate this news. It’s true to say that Jaynes heart really sank. Jayne admires Emirates president Sir Tim Clark, but after reading that virtual windows which can already be found on the newest Boeing 777-300ER aircraft are so good, it’s better than with the natural eye, again her heart sank further.


Jayne is horrified at the thought that other airlines will follow the leading giant as this will save them fuel and get passengers from A to B quicker. So Jayne publicity wants to share her aviation addiction in the hope that people will back her and think that the sky’s need to stay an open place for people to freely see the world.


Give her a follow on to see what she will have to say.



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