Memories @twylaliden

By Twyla Lidén

It never seizes to amaze me how quickly something becomes a part of my world. In an instant, something new is a part of me. Constantly adapting, hardly ever giving myself time to reflect. Life right now is about fast pace and quick results.

I rarely find myself prioritizing time to truly process and digest periods of my life. Constantly moving towards the next project or adventure, often missing the transition of phases. A quick lifestyle is a trend, that’s how you’re supposed to live, the next thing and then the next thing and then the next.

I don’t like this, not the slightest bit.

Sure, having things to do and look forward to is vital to keep life going. But what is it worth if you don’t sit down and actually put it in context and evaluate it? Write some words about it, print some pictures, brag to friends.

I let my memories slip into the back of my head way too often. What’s the point of experiencing something without extracting from it?

For this year I am taking things at my pace. This does not mean being a lazy couch potato, but filling my schedule with just enough things to be enriched by but leaving enough space and time to process.

Putting away proper time to reflect hasn’t been something I’ve done since I started SCA. Time keeps slipping out of my hands and before I know it a new project has begun before the other has finished. I understand that it is the pace of the real workplace, but once again what do you gain from exhaustion and work that is plain? Just feeding and feeding without digesting? And then when you sit there ready for retirement you have nothing to remember, only a long blob of events that you can’t quite distinguish from one another. I feel so many memories get lost when you’re in constant motion.

I need some sort of consolidation of my thoughts to put away in my pocket, to be looked at whenever needed. I know this is what you would call a journal, but when I finally sit down to spill the beans, nothing comes out. Nothing about what’s happened, only my fictional stories. Sure they’re great but I don’t have the ability to remember and decode my little tales.

A fast pace burns you out, without a doubt. I believe in my own tempo and rhythm, I trust my brain. It’s the only thing that I can rely on to stay sane. Finding time for contemplation is essential, to see every experience’s potential.

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