Phone Notes – By @UntiedEye

By Steve Favell



Phone Notes


A Good Story Deserves Embellishment: Phone Notes


It may take two to tango but you need at least three to limbo


Ws are liars, they’re actually double Vs


Best frown in town


Backpacks: the worst thing to happen to suits since rolled up sleeves


Eyes on the skies


Roasts should be moved to Saturdays. Sunday’s are for takeaways and eating shit. Just like Jesus would want it.


Commuter scooters act as target practice


Conversation magpie


You smoke so cool




Today I’ll be mainly dressing like a bruise


Crooked fingers


Why’s it always the fatties with a chip on their shoulder? Or their hand? Or lap? Or face?


Reckon I could have been a child genius but I was too busy being sick at pogs




Let’s do something beautiful


My eyes are tired, everything else is fine


Ellen Degenerates


Grab the horn by the bulls


You sound like you think you’re God’s nephew


Blood and ink


We could have fun in a rowing boat to hell


You have to cross the line to know where it is


‘When you make everything perfect there’s no friction. The universe was created by friction and sex is about friction. There should always be friction.’


‘“Don’t walk on the grass” Why not? It’s fucking gorgeous. You don’t walk on the grass. I walk on the grass.’


‘If you’re gunna be different, you’re gunna get hit by rocks. So you need to learn to like rocks. And everyone else better practice their aim.’

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