Rambling on my deathbed – By @MadStandish

By Maddy Standish


Rambling on my deathbed

We’re way over halfway through the SCA year. It’s not long until we’re released into the real world, flapping our tiny little wings and getting shoved out of the nest by papa bird Marc.

You’re either flying, gliding or crashing. Who knows what’s going to happen. You know we’re going to have to actually work? Like, real jobs? Where they pay us to do this stuff, instead of us paying to do it.


Like, we did our first portfolio check on Friday. That was fine. We didn’t do as badly as expected. My partner wasn’t in as he spent the day glued to the toilet. D&AD is over and we only have to make one more case study for Cannes and then we get to solidly focus on having the nicest, shiniest, most beautiful book in the world. Or at least nicer than the ones coming out of the other ad schools.


I’m feeling rather run down still and suspect that my dear peers have infected me. The studio deserves a biohazard sticker and the fridges should probably be bombed. As I lie here, frail and weak, I will share some of the things that are tickling my fancy at the moment, with you, imaginary reader. Also, the things that have annoyed me because I like to complain.


Things I’ve enjoyed recently:

  • Petting all my dogs on their faces.
  • Getting the bus into Brixton instead of Central Line from East London.
  • My boyfriend coming home from his very long road trip around America.
  • The blueberries that I ate earlier were at peak loveliness.
  • Free coffees from mum and dad’s house.
  • Doing alright in the book check.
  • Finally, vaguely understanding SMPs. More or less.
  • Having a free house.
  • Eating vegetables.


Things I have not been enjoying recently:

  • Not being able to fit into my Spring/Summer clothes.
  • The lorry who decided to do a U-Turn at a junction during rush hour. He got stuck.
  • My boyfriend going on TWO safaris while I have not gone on one.
  • Being ill. Getting sick is WEAK, but, here I am, coughing my guts up and shooting Benylin with a Lemsip chaser.
  • One of the dogs chewed through my camouflage smoking Crocs.
  • The broken sink in the studio kitchen.
  • My hair is in a sorry state. Rather dry.
  • The local shop has been out of tobacco for two weeks. I’ve done 30 minute pilgrimages to obtain it.


I hope this exercise helps my body heal faster. Pray for me.



The copy scores 79.9 in the Flesch Reading Ease test

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