SCABs

This is like the “hair smell” – By @karolinakezdi

By Karolina Kezdi

 

 

This is like the “hair smell”


Hair smell is the smell of the scalp, the skin of the head, the hair follicle, the grease, the dandruff, but unequivocally not the smell of your shampoo, or any other hair product. It’s hard to describe, because normally we don’t know this smell at all. We have never heard about it, never experienced or never been keen to name it before. But to read about it now, you will recognise, and you won’t be able to not perceive that smell.


SCA is the same. I feel bad if in the morning I can’t find a new way, how can the broken bathroom door be fixed, how to avoid my flatmate see me again naked and wet, when I try to squeeze the dog out who licks the toilet, but I can practise all of the techniques, because the condition is consistent six weeks ago.


If I ask my friend for their opinion about the eggs benedict, a girl’s bangs on the tube, a tinder match I want to hear numbers, percentages, partial results, calculation, a score. Pretty, good or fine, is not enough, not for me, not for a proper answer. Lazy and predictable.

I hate the word good. Good is bad, I want great. Fine is even worse. It sounds like a pity compliment. I couldn’t hear it differently anymore.


And yes, maybe I’m socially awkward when I make notes during Netflix and chill, or take a photo series about staines of swatted mosquitoes on the wall and dead and dried flies on the window frame, and make it a challenge every time I do the grocery shopping to get a new recipe with asparagus from another customer at the store, and always ask the Domino’s delivery guy, does he sometimes buy mirelit pizza too, or being asked by the security guy in  the opposite building near Piccadilly circus, “Am I okay, everything is alright?”, because he saw on the CCTV that I hadn’t moved in the last half an hour (Because I was staring at the adverts).


My brain has been rewritten, knows the hair smell, and knows new ways to experience my life. I gave it a promotion, to set SCA for the premier searching engine.

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