SCABs

A SCAB during the busiest week of SCA so far you say?

Right now we have New Blood WIPs, a two-day brief, a one-week brief, and a two-week portfolio brief on the go. We also have over 100 case study videos to watch and then write a paragraph about. For that reason, this SCAB is set to be the worst of my life. And I spent the last one talking about candles. 

There is normally a 500 word limit for these things. God, that’s a lot. That’s, like, 10 tweets. Long ones at that. I don’t even think I know 500 separate words. That’s fine, though, because repetition is allowed. Yep, you read that right. Repetition is, indeed, allowed. It is! It’s allowed. Repetition. Who would have thought. Quite shocking, isn’t it? Maybe, as a challenge, for my next SCAB I’ll try not to repeat a single word. Hang on, that sounds an awful lot like one of Caroline’s evil copywriting challenges, which, actually, I would like to never subject myself to ever again, please. Scrap that, I’m already backpedaling. I’ll have to rely on a last-minute stroke of genius. I’m not one to advocate writing total drivel for the sake of writing something, but this week is an exception. We’ve all got a lot of important shit to do, so I really don’t need to hear anyone’s snooty comments about how pointless and bad this SCAB is, okay? What even makes a good blog, anyway? Who is to say? Whooooooo is to say. 

It’s a busy week, alright. I think I said that already, though. What does someone write about in such a turbulent time? What to write, what to write. Notice how I’ve now actually written quite a lot, but said very little. I am aware this is the opposite of good copywriting — but actually, if you truly understood the mechanisms at play here, then you’d realise that this is all high irony. It’s an art form. I am using humour whilst subverting the expectation of what one would expect to find in a blog. The joke here is that I am actually writing about not knowing what to write, and yet, it keeps going. My fingers continue to move. The page fills up, and that little scroll bar on the right is getting smaller and smaller.

Anyone who is still reading these lines has either skipped most of the text above, or has woefully persevered. And, you know what – either way, I honestly respect it. I don’t find that rude at all. Has anyone accidentally tried to hit Ctrl+Shift+C to see their word count on Google Docs and then actually hit Ctrl+Shift+F and then made all their tabs disappear? Because I just did that and nearly had a heart attack. This experience really has turned out to be a whirlwind, after all. I’d say I need a lie-down but I’m already in bed, which is where I spend most aaaaand 500 words.

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