By Flavia Ventura

Circumstances had me fly solo. 

The decision to move back to the motherland might be the most illogical I’ve ever made. 

With such great opportunities in London, why move back to a country where the unemployment rate between young people is 40%. 

Truth is, I’m not sure myself. It feels like the right thing to do. 

6 years abroad are a long time. The first 3 are pure joy and excitement, the ‘best of your life’ if you will, the fourth and fifth are a limbo, and the sixth is homesickness. 

The culture, the people, the years you’ve missed, the graduation parties you didn’t attend, the birthdays, your family, your friends, the grandparents restlessly looking older, the sun, the feeling of being home – where nothing can destroy you.

I’ve idealised it. 

Being an eternally unsatisfied person, in less than a year I’ll probably have enough of it.

Either way, my decision has already had a couple of repercussions. First off the awareness I won’t necessarily find a placement. Second, I’ve become a single. 

After 9 months of partnerships, it’s strange now having to come up with concept, ideas, executions and craft on my own. 

If it’s true that 1+1=3, I’m in a big disadvantage here. 

Its been quite tough but I’ve got to say, I’m enjoying  this copy business. I’ve always told myself I could never write as I’m a foreigner. Truth is, if you don’t try, of course you won’t be able to.

Although the weekly headline brief might seem a bit of a pain, I think it’s a good exercise and it’s definitely helping me to get a hang of it. 

What I’ve learnt in the past couple of weeks is that comparison is the enemy. Being a single means that all the pressure is on you, and you only. If the idea is shit, there is no one else to blame – and generally, we all like to blame others too frequently. 

Hearing other people’s conversations, seeing their work and feeling their excitement freezes me. I often feel like I haven’t interpreted the brief the right way. It only properly hit me this week that briefs are set so ‘open’ so that we can interpret them the way we want to. There isn’t such thing as right or wrong per se.

I guess what’s left to say is that having worked so effortlessly with Adeline (much love your way Addy doll) on PB8 and other little briefs, it now seems absurd for me to ride solo but hey, it will be alright.