Enter the void

Everyone is finally being paired up to basically… date, I mean create with each other and it’s a tricky game. How to tell whether you enjoy someone’s presence, energy or personality or whether you can actually create incredible work with that person. Finding someone you can clash with, even be annoyed by and then still wanna go for a pint with.

The days are darker, and the briefs are taking longer to dissect, unravel and decide on. Every week, it feels like I’ve been wearing a different hat, I started with yellow, went onto red and this week feels black. I’m learning about myself, like I’m addicted to sugar because I don’t drink caffeine and I have trouble switching off the day and sleeping. I have written poetry, performed stand up and meditated. SCA is like a retreat that devolves into a cult quickly. I’m drowning in ideas but in a good way, it’s both exhilarating and stressful. It’s hard not to let it consume your life outside the course, like a pastor on a podium, I am trying to convert everyone. 

Time is of the essence and I have no idea where to find the extra hours to complete everything I want to learn. I’m naturally impatient, so the idea I haven’t mastered illustrator, made a short film and understood propositions yet, is eroding at the tiny speck of patience that resides within. Ideas and executions are not simple formulas you can follow, they come in bursts that are sometimes fast, and often slow. Born from passing comments or walls of post-its, unexpected and compelling. 

Finally, asking for help just wasn’t programmed into my system at birth, there must have been a glitch. I’m the eldest sibling, grandchild etc so I don’t go for help, I give it. That’s something I’ve noticed that I need to change. Being vulveranable about my ideas and learning not to cage them in an airtight box with no air to breath. Letting them adapt and develop feels obvious after some of the wonderful advice I’ve received.

I’m used to being a lone wolf, years of taking pictures of peoples houses then sliding onto social media management mean, I have been a team of one. I always have been. I’m trying to figure out what works best and how. I like bouncing ideas off people but also like drowning everyone out with my airpods, it’s all about the task. The briefs don’t really give you the time to learn people’s quirks, habits and fall into a type of synergy, because just as you’ve got used to someone. Ring! The bell is up, it’s time for your next speed date. 


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