My eyes are turning into rectangles! 

There a lot of wife’s tales I don’t believe any more and some I still question. My face won’t stay stuck if I stick my tongue and cross my eyes. I’m confidant of that. I’m less confidant that stepping on cracks won’t brake my mom’s back that’s why I always call my mom when I come home from a walk to make sure her spine is great condition (she’s doing great).  

I had dismissed one as total fable, but lately I’ve been worrying more about it. “If you watch too much TV, you’ll eye will turn into squares.” I believe this text can be interpreted for the modern day. ‘TV” clearly stand for any and all screens. The wives that wrote that tale did not see the dawning of telephones and computers, and I’d like to extend their meaning of TV in incorporate all screens. They also did not foresee that the common aspect ratio used in making screens would change from square to rectangle, so I’ll give them that as well.

As a kid, I laughed at the idea that my oval eyes could turn square, but now I’m not laughing with as much glee, more of a nervous chuckle. 

About five or six years ago I read that 7-14-year olds look at a screen for 7 hours a day. At the time I was so far from look at screens for that long that I felt great. I thought I was resilient to their addictive traits. I didn’t have a smart phone or a TV, so I wasn’t staring at screens too much. 

Since this quarantine, though, it’s all change. The first thing I do when I wake up is shut off the alarm on my phone. Screen. Then I check messages. More screen. After breakfast and a shower, I’m on my laptop for the next 5 hours till lunch. During lunch, I might watch an episode of something. After that, it’s back on the laptop till dinner. Cook dinner. Then I’ll watch a movie. Most of my life is now taking place between me and a screen. 

I’m not saying it’s terrible and I’m not going to go on a rant about how screens are destroying our lives, but I do think my eyes are going a little rectangle. 

Maybe this is just the new way of the world. Humans are made to adapt. Perhaps the people that have been on screens the most in their childhood are going to thrive as our life becomes less of a circle and more of a square. Maybe, we literally will adapt to having rectangle eyes! I’m not opposed to change. 

Even as writing this I’m starting to regret that I didn’t master Halo as a child. Who knows how far back my bloodline is by evolutionary standards? Oh my goodness, have I screwed over my entire family by not pewning noobs in Call of Duty? 

I may need to readjust. I suppose I can make up for lost video games by watching more movies. It’s time my eyes turned to rectangles. I’m ready to evolve. I’m ready to watch thousands of movies and never look away from the bright lights!