Power of the Perm

Samson claimed that he lost his power, when a lover lopped off his locks.

But I’ve got another theory: what if he was just scared?

The fact is, sometimes it’s hard not to believe what you read in the papers. As an ex theatre actor, we were always told, “never read the reviews”, but ‘twas an itch that demanded scratching…! It’s amazing how powerful the media can be in swaying public opinion, and accordingly, how confidence in one’s own performance, can evaporate in an instant.

Samson (and his fans) were conditioned to believe that his prowess as a warrior was solely down to his formidable follicles. In reality, he just hadn’t got round to cutting it (life as a killer is pretty full-on), and with the recent cost-of-living hikes, he’d been forced to prioritise his expenditure.

Step forth the poster boy of the 1200’s (BC): naturally shredded, nice hair, and great at killing.

The thing is (even back then), in terms of brand affiliation, not all of those things are good for PR. But ‘hair’, that was something they could run with.

“Goldilocks strikes again…”
“The Mane Offender”
“Power of the Perm”
“Hair to the Throne!”

The subsequent placement of ads for asses-milk conditioner, trebled revenue across print media (and tablets obvs…)

But as headline after headline linked hair to heroism, Samson too believed the hype. It seemed that gloss and volume preceded guts and victory.

Until one sultry evening, after effortlessly slaying a thousand philistines with the jawbone of a donkey, his undercover girlfriend gave him the chop. He awoke from his a post-coital slumber, not only devoid of his dangly bits, but also bereft of his bravery.

As the front pages announced his downfall, Sammy-boy crumbled from within. What if they were right? No wiggy, no Mr Biggie.

And here lies the rub: The man had been operating in the ‘comfort zone’. We all do it – it’s a natural default setting. Stepping outside of this zone is never easy, and as the name suggests, is often ‘uncomfortable’… but only by taking this risk, can we learn, grow, and find out what we’re truly capable of.

So as I sit here in my local barbers, getting my regulation haircut, I am in fact readying myself for battle (training). 3 grades shorter than my standard issue, but like the McDonald’s Saver Menu Ads, I wanna get my moneys worth.

It’s funny what we seek power / comfort from, and what we are gifted with.

Samson’s real strength came from his formulaic killing streak (and a little divine intervention). The plaudits that followed, only added to his confidence – when you’re winning, you’re unstoppable. But without his lucky charm, he felt like a fish out of water.

No battle (brief) will be the same, and whilst I too am apprehensive about how I will fare in the field, I welcome the discomfort, because I know where it will lead me.

Richard Shanks

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