Solution to Overthinking – By @nclrolly
Solution to Overthinking
So, I spoke to Matt Follows last week and he gave me some very useful tips for the above problem. Sharing is caring, therefore, here you go.
Problem: I think too much about other people. Sometimes, I feel like a should act as I am a representative of Hong Kong and that I should not mess up to avoid a bad reputation of my city.
Solution: What are my morals/values?
How: Find my creative mission by asking these three questions:
1. What do I want to get out of my life? (i.e. what is my goal)
2. Why is it important for me to have this goal? (Consider if my goal stems externally. For example, I might want my parent’s validation, but remember, if someone never wants to be impressed, it will be quite hard to get validation from that person anyway. Is it, then, necessary to include him/her in my goal?)
3. Why is it possible for me to have this goal? (What are the small steps I need to take to achieve this goal? If I need to wake up earlier for it to happen, recognising that you have done this before would motivate you. Keep on adding answers to this list.)
Problem: What is my goal? How do I make sure my goal stems from within?
Solution: Write a Leader’s Legacy.
How: When I retired,
– What lesson did I teach people
– What kind of people did I inspire?
Problem: I prioritise other people’s feelings over mines (I have been encouraged to believe that thinking for the collective is more helpful than thinking for myself since I was a child).
Solution: Every time I make a decision, ask myself, ‘What would someone who loves herself do right now?’
Problem: I go down a rabbit hole when I make a mistake. I want to be more resilient.
Solution: Victory Journal to internalised success.
How: Write down three things every night that you are successful on. E.g. I got through the day, I was myself today.
Solution 2: Learn from NBA players. If they made the shot, they say ‘I am brilliant’. If they missed the shot, they say, ‘needs work’. That’s what I need to say myself in times of success and failures (instead of, ‘Rolly, you are such a bad speaker…)
Some good podcasts to check out:
– The Accidental Creative Podcast by Todd Henry (https://open.spotify.com/show/6vY9DKLLzfM7opgWlcgkPJ)
– The 21st Century Creative Podcast by Mark McGuinness (https://open.spotify.com/show/5wi5WsPPh6EFaSz92u6L8i)
– The Pressure Proof Creative Podcast by Matt Follows (https://open.spotify.com/show/3GlOJrcps5mFqP5wzoRon8)
My generosity and kindness are massively appreciated.