I love Brixton, the beating heart of South London (apart from the gentrification and pints of Guinness for £6.40). But one thing I don’t like is my commute there (that’s rich considering I live in the neighbouring borough of Southwark)—more specifically my hatred for the Jubilee and Northern line. You’re probably thinking why is she such a diva about transport links? Why doesn’t she just get the bus instead? Or cycle if she hates the tube so much?
Well, firstly, I love a little moan, especially when it comes to TFL so please let me be. Secondly, the sheer thought of cycling down Old Kent Road (for those who don’t know about Old Kent Road, it’s the brown one on Monopoly) during rush hour sends shivers down my spine. I am not equipped for such activities, most notably when my entire footwear collection consists of Docs, Crocs and Birkenstocks. It’s just not happening.
To make my tube journey more enjoyable, I decided to take some notes of my thoughts and observations, enjoy.
“Disco Carrot” – What does this even mean?
“Why the bloody hell do people keep their jackets on during their tube journey? It’s like I’ve walked into a Greggs sausage roll oven as soon as I descend those escalators to the fiery depths/the Seventh circle of hell that is the Victoria line”. – I like the juxtaposition between Greggs and the Seventh circle of hell on this one.
“Don’t make eye contact or you might instantaneously combust” – I wonder who I made eye contact with this day.
“That feeling when you arrive on the platform and the tube arrives >>> 😍” – Wow, someone is easily pleased…
“Children on leashes” – Ummm okay then?
“Women stuffing a black pug into a special bag on the Jubilee line London Bridge” – Reading this back, I feel like I should have called the RSPCA instead of jotting this down on my notes app… Not quite sure why I did, but I maybe this could be used for something one day.
“Why are so many people on the northern line today? (8:52 am) who is actually trekking to South at this hour? And of all places TOWARDS TOOTING” – lol
“Someone’s breath was KICKINGGG on the tube today oh my days. It smelled like I was in a cloud of morning breath” – please just brush your teeth before leaving the house, thank you.
Tips and Tricks to Make Your Tube Journey More Enjoyable:
First tip, don’t take the tube. If possible, re-route your journey and enjoy a pleasant experience on the London Overground instead. The orange interior is so snazzy. It’s spacious and I can see some lovely views on my journey, my favourite part of my journey is going past Millwall’s football stadium (joking), agh the joys of the Overground. Also, with a student Oyster, off-peak travel within the same zone costs £1.05, which is a bargain. Don’t even get me started on tube fare prices, that’s a whole other blog.
I like to look at the adverts on the tube and think about how I can make them better. I also like to think about the person that signed them off and think about what was going through their mind at the time.
During my morning commutes, I like to start my day with some heavy metal and my Portuguese lessons on Duolingo, this really gets my brain going. On my journey home, I try to write SMPs and take note of what clothes, but more specifically the shoes people are wearing to inform my work, lots of Asics nowadays.
I really need to get my bike fixed and find an alternative route to Old Kent Road.