The End is Nigh

The End is Nigh… If you’ve found yourself in the same corner of the internet as me. You may have seen the thousands of videos on TikTok warning you about the great rapture (if you haven’t seen it, just look it up). The faithful ascend, and the sinners are left to suffer. So get praying, forgive your enemies, and delete your search history; the great rapture of 2025 is upon us.  

Except, it was supposed to happen on the 23rd of September. I know what you're thinking. Everyone is still here, so either we’re all awful sinners, or the rapture didn’t happen. 

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Don’t get me wrong, I am a Christian myself. I was intrigued to see what would happen on the 23rd.  For those believers out there, I hope that you didn’t condemn your boss to the eternal flames too harshly on the 22nd. I’m not dismissing the prediction, merely a miscalculation, but I tend not to believe in prophecies that are popularised on TikTok. Like most people, the 23rd was a very normal day.

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 I woke up, found myself in a completely different part of London. Surrounded by new people. A new Guru who’s teaching us new perspectives, new ideologies, new ways of thinking, and new ways of communicating that sway people's hearts and minds. 

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We quite literally ascended to the top of the international house for views as far as the eye can see… Hang on… maybe this is the rapture… I’ve been captured by the rapture. This is not a school, this is a religion. 

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A church of creativity where we are the disciples. Come to think of it, here are the rules of the school. 

The 10 ComMARCments. 

1. Thou shalt attend Town Hall at 9:30.

 2. If you’re on time, you're late

.3. Thou shalt dance if late.

4. Thou shalt kill your ugly babies.

5. Show your ‘briefs’ to everyone 

6. Thou shalt be WIPped weekly.

7. Thou will reflect every Friday.

8. Reciprocity shall be your North Star.

9. Thou shalt worship Nancy Kline.

10. Originality is Stolen.

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I guess the rapture did happen.

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